Hopeless
by LeFarFadet
Summary: Watch out for the possible spoilers up to 274! This is how I initially imagined Kanae's talk with Kuon could go in 273, and how these events would lead to the special "white day" chapter. It was supposed to be a follow up from chapter 272, but 273 took a different route, so that makes it an alternate version...


**Hopeless**

"Well, hello to you too, Kotonami san." He said, annoyed, to the girl blocking his way "Is there anything I can help you with?"

"Oh you bet there is. Though it's not for me, it's for my friend there." Kotonami san answered coolly, and when she was sure she caught his attention, she removed her foot from the wall. "What exactly is going on with you and her?"

Kuon took a much needed minute to reflect on the situation. She and Kyoko had just been talking. Were they talking about him? About Fuwa? What did she say? Why was Kyoko avoiding him? Did her friend know?

"I am not sure myself what is going on." he said "Mogami san seems to be mad at me, and I also would like to clarify the reason." She frowned. "If you have any additional information…"

"You love her right?" she asked bluntly.

"I do." He didn't hesitate one second and Kotonami san's look seemed to change slightly.

"How much longer do you plan on keeping it from her?"

"I don't. I intend to show her, I just… well, she needs time." He lowered his gaze, remembering several instances when he tried to express his feelings and she just pushed them away. "I can't force these feelings on her when she's clearly not ready."

"I respect that." Kotonami san said in a more charitable tone. "How are you sure that she's not ready?"

"Did she say something?"

"She surely seems preoccupied with your alleged love life."

Her words surprised him. Was Kyoko's reaction actually related to the Kana incident, like Yashiro suggested?

"The recent headlines, you know."

A shiver brushed his skin. Was she somehow… _jealous_?

"I don't know what you told her, but for some reason she has convinced herself that you were _repressing_ your feelings, whatever that means. And now…" She squinted her eyes "What I'm trying to say is you're going to lose her trust."

_Wait. _What was that bit about him repressing his feelings? _Why…_

"If she means anything to you" Kotonami continued, "You'll fix it."

"I'm sorry…" How would Kotonami san know of such a private detail? "She thinks that I… what?"

"Something about her _being a student_, the _age difference_, and _suppressed feelings_…"

"Who said that?" These were oddly specific words that reminded him of one specific bird.

"That girl did."

"I see." _That will teach you, to trust a stranger_. "Well if you will excuse me, I need to go."

* * *

This was a day of unexpected results, and for the girl in the chicken suit, it had already reached its emotional peak – or so she thought…

"You." the tone was ruthless, and the voice unmistakable.

Kyoko's blood froze instantly and she turned around to face a very closed off Tsuruga san. He was the last person she wanted to see.

And she had thought she'd be safe as Bo! The shooting for _Kimagure Rock_ had been a welcomed distraction, to take her mind off things, at least a little, after running away from him twice that day already. How did he know to corner her inside the chicken costume? _Wait. _He didn't know _that_ was _her_, right? Yet here he was, staring at her pressingly. Did he come here to talk about Kana san?

Bo would traditionally tease the actor at that precise moment when they met, _"what is the matter this time" _she would say, in the joyful tone of the anonymous chicken impersonator. She really wasn't in the mood, though – or even capable of doing so, right now. Just staying there in front of him was already taking every bit of courage that she had.

"Who did you tell and what did you tell them?"

"Uuuuh…" she was mortified. Didn't she actually tell Moko san pretty much everything about his _supposed _secret love for Morizumi san? How could she betray Tsuruga san that way? And how did he even find out? _Moko san would never…_

She also kind of mentioned part of it to president Takarada, didn't she? She had been so careless with Tsuruga san's secret.

"Shouldn't you be asking _Boost_?" she said innocently, trying to buy time.

"I'm not talking about Kana's stunt, and you _know_ it." Tsuruga san's eyes hardened. She wondered if she had already seen him that mad. "You're the only one..."

_Wait._ What did he mean _"Kana's stunt"_? Were they not...

"How did you know it was her?" Kyoko felt like he just punched her. So she _had_ guessed right the first time. It really was… "I never said her name. How do you know her? What did you tell her?"

"There must be a misunderstanding, I haven't told anything to the girl that you like." she swore with a wing on her heart. If only Bo could just run away from him, like Kyoko did. It hurt so bad to be discussing that other girl with him.

"Well, she hates me now." These were the first word he didn't say with anger, and it broke her heart to see the frustration and the hurt on his face. "She won't even answer my calls, let alone be in my presence…"

_Morizumi san did that? _She had not realized they were still in contact. It made sense. She felt a stab in her heart.

"I don't see how she could hate you." Why was she defending her? She should instead tell him how beneath him this girl was. "But she's probably hurt, because of-"

"No... It's from even _before_ that." his head dropped even more "I think she's in love with someone else."

He knew about that Cedric guy? The more he spoke, the more he confirmed her fears: he really was talking about that girl Morizumi san.

"Maybe…" it was hard to find a reason why any woman would prefer any another man to Tsuruga Ren… "she might have not even realized… Have you even ever acted on your feelings?" _Please don't answer, please don't answer._

"She gets angry when I give her special treatment." He snorted "She hasn't said anything about the personalized gift I sent her for _white day_." He smiled bitterly "I was _so_ sure she'd love it…"

How had the mood changed so much in less than a minute? Here he was confiding in her again when she didn't want to hear any of it. A mixture of longing, softness, and something indefinable: the look on his face, when he talked about her... it was torture. She didn't care to know that he was still in touch with Morizumi san, that they still exchanged Valentine and White Day gifts. To think this horrible person received a special gift from Tsuruga san and didn't even thank him for it!

"So, does that mean you are no longer suppressing your feelings?" she asked, in spite of herself.

"I'm…" he stopped abruptly and the speed of the mood-change broke a new record. "These" he said coldly. "are the words she used." His eyes were implacable.

"_She" _Was he talking about Moko san? _Why, Moko san, why did you need to ask Tsuruga san about it?_ Cunning as he was, how could he not figure out it had nothing to do with Amamiya san!

"Huh?" Kyoko summoned her most innocent chicken face.

"So it really _was_ you."

"I didn't mean to!" Kyoko exclaimed "I swear!"

"Oh, you didn't mean to share the private details of my life? It is such a relief to know you didn't _mean_ to."

His tone was so cold. How did this man go back and forth between depression and anger so easily?

"I was just thinking out loud…" she lied.

"Of course you were. About the private details of my life."

"Everybody is talking about the private details of your life!" she yelled, standing up. That seemed to startle him and she went on "I guess I read you wrong, I was surprised. That's all." She crossed her wings and sat back down.

"I don't care what they say about Kana." Tsuruga san said "And I don't see how it gives you the right to discuss it with people." He grumbled "Who knows what damage you've done!" he didn't raise his voice but his tone was heated.

"All I said is it didn't make sense, ok, maybe that's what your friend overheard…" Kyoko wanted to cry.

He shook his head in denial. "You said something to someone, she heard it and she figured it out." He said "She realized that I…" he let out a long sigh. "She just doesn't feel the same."

Just what was wrong with the world? Tsuruga Ren was in love and the recipient of his love didn't love him back? And the recipient of his love was… that girl?

"You know" she said, annoyed "I don't know what you see in her, after all, she is very…." She didn't finish when she saw the look he was giving her. If she thought he was mad before…

He closed in on her. He was so scary. She couldn't move.

"I realize I have been too carefree with you" Tsuruga san said, gripping the chicken head with both hands "it's time I know who I'm talking to."

* * *

"Nooooo!" the chicken wailed, holding on to its head with all its feathers.

Kanae couldn't believe what she was seeing.

_What am I looking at?  
_

Was Tsuruga Ren acquainted with Kyoko's chicken character? _No, it can't be… _Did he not know who she was?

Kanae's hand unconsciously came to her slightly gaping mouth. Was Tsuruga Ren actually _that much _hopeless? Had he actually _confessed_ to her, without either of them realizing what was happening? _He might even be worse than her._

"Oh." She commented, and both of them, realizing she was here, stopped bickering. "Well that explains a lot."

"What…" Kyoko was altering her voice, she sounded like an older man. "What are you doing here?"

Originally, she had come to see how her friend was doing, her conversation with Japan's top actor had left her worried and she had gotten curious to know Kyoko's side of the story.

But looking at them right now, she felt like an idiot. How long were these two going to torment each other with their stupidity? Wouldn't things just fix themselves eventually?

"You know what? I've changed my mind: I don't want to get involved."

"But" Kyoko's wings reached out to her "Moko san!" she let out.

"_Moko_ san?" Tsuruga repeated after her.

The two of them turned to face one another. The look on Tsuruga's face was priceless.

"See" Kanae commented before she turned around "I'll let you figure it out."

* * *

"I'm so sorry!" The voice coming from the chicken head was still muffled, but it suddenly didn't sound the same, at all. It was much more familiar. "It's not what you think, I promise." He couldn't believe his ears.

"Mogami san?" he was baffled "Is that you?"

The chicken dropped its head in discomfort, and didn't resist when Kuon's hands closed in and unscrewed it.

Kyoko's face was red in embarrassment, when he removed her chicken head. What was the meaning of all this? Was she inside the chicken all along?

"It was just so embarrassing…" she explained in a small voice "And I wanted to help you, but I didn't know what to do..."

What was she talking about? How was _she_ the one _embarrassed_? What should _he _feel, after flat out confessing to her and being ignored and lied to for months? He was at loss for words.

"I thought it would be worse for you, if you knew it was me."

What was she saying? That she didn't love him back and didn't want to hurt him?

"And then, I met Morizumi san, and I… I realized that she was… well I mean…"

_Morizumi who?_

"But it clearly doesn't matter, since you are with Kana now." She pouted slightly. "You sure got over _that_." She grumbled "Good for you."

She seemed to have finished her explanation. _Morizumi san_, he tried to remember. Was she a previous co-actress? The name did sound familiar.

"Are you saying that Morizumi san is, hum… the girl that I was talking about?" Had she… not realized?

"I promise I didn't say anything to her!" Kyoko screeched "she was the one who mentioned the ring that you gave her." She said in a bitter tone.

_A ring? _It came back to him: the _Purple Down_ set. Morizumi Kimiko, he remembered, she made the other actors go crazy, she tried to manipulate him. What did _she _have to do with anything? And then it hit him. She was about Kyoko's age. _Don't tell me… _What in the world was she imagining?

"So, basically you took advantage of me to get personal information from me under a disguise." He teased "Then you met this Morizumi san and, for some reason, you thought she was my type. Did I get it right?"

Kyoko's face was tense. She really didn't get it, did she? It all made sense now. The way she rejected his advances, if she thought he was talking about another girl, of course she would…

"I mean…"

"Because the age matched?" He caught her eyes with his, but she couldn't hold his look.

This misunderstanding explained her reaction to the Kana news. It didn't make sense that he talked about a younger woman and was seen kissing an older one. It reinforced her image of him as a playboy. On top of that, _Morizumi Kimiki_, really? How bad was she resisting his love, that she would come to consider such an appalling candidate for it?

"Hum…" he said after a short silence "Isn't this Morizumi kind of… a _terrible_ human being?"

Her eyes shot back at him.

"Isn't she?" she agreed.

"I think she is." He nodded. "And a pathological liar." He gave her a look and she blushed. "Whatever she told you, it's not true."

Was he imagining it, or was the look in her eyes really getting warmer? Her face seemed to lighten up from inside. She opened her mouth, but didn't say anything, and she looked away.

This was so ironic. Even now, she still didn't get it. What more would it take? How did she not see it, after the conversation they just had?

* * *

It was really hard to have Tsuruga san looking at her like that. It was even harder to hide her relief. _Of course, she lied! _Just the fact that he wasn't in love with that girl was a weight lifted from her heart.

"So, you see" he spoke in a light tone "It's not that I am a playboy, women just take advantage of me." He said, using his American gesture.

He was so annoying when he did that.

"Like Kana san?" she huffed.

"_Just_ like Kana san." He confirmed with a bitter smile.

She looked away.

There were so many things that she wanted to know… Why was there a picture of him and Kana san kissing? Did he not like Kana san? If it wasn't Kana nor Morizumi san, then… who was the girl that he loved so desperately?

She risked a glance at him. He was looking at her thoughtfully and she turned back right away. He was so intimidating.

"I think you were right." He said after a while.

"What?"

"She obviously hasn't figured it out yet." His face was unreadable. "That she's the one." He frowned.

_Really…_ Kyoko hated that girl.

"I hope she understands…" he paused "that there is nothing going on with Kana."

"It really didn't seem that way in the picture." Kyoko snapped in spite of herself. He looked amused.

"Do _you_ by any chance want to know what happened with Kana?"

"It doesn't concern me." Was she that easy to read?

"I think it does."

"I don't care" she lifted her shoulders. She really wanted to know.

"Oh." He said. "Well ok, then, I guess that's all." He stood up.

She followed him. _Wait!_ She wanted to stop him but she didn't know how.

"Before I go, there is one thing I'd like to confirm. I'm sorry I didn't answer properly earlier, but you were right." He said, leaning closer "I _am_ done suppressing these feelings."

* * *

Waiting for Ren out front of the TBM building, Yashiro was surprised to see Kotonami Kanae walking out of it.

"Oh" she said when she noticed him "good evening."

"Good evening, Kotonami san."

"They're both inside" she said "and by the looks of it, it might take some time…"

"What do you mean_ both_?" He thought Kyoko was done for the day.

"Of course you don't know either." Kotonami san rolled her eyes "this is so annoying… well, why are you here?" she asked.

It was a difficult question. He couldn't tell her that Ren was friend with a chicken…

"I'm waiting for my charge." He said.

"Does it have anything to do with a giant chicken?"

Yashiro's eyes turned to saucers. How did she know?

"I don't think it's going to be a secret much longer: that girl is the chicken." She explained matter-of-factly and waited.

_That girl… Kyoko chan is the…_

"What?" wasn't that chicken Ren's confident?

"Yep. I bet you'd like to know what they're talking about." She chuckled.

"I…" he wanted to know. He _so_ wanted to know. "Did Ren find out?"

"He was about to when I left."

Yashiro wanted to ask so many questions! What did Kotonami san know? What were they saying, in there? He wanted to be a mouse and go spy on them.

"I…." he was stomping his feet.

"Tsk…" She rolled her eyes. "Stop being a pain and just _go_."

* * *

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"But _she_'s not…"

"Morizumi san?" he made a face "definitely not."

She gave him a small smile.

"That's good."

"How could you think so little of me?"

"I don't." she muttered "I really don't."

A few more seconds passed awkwardly.

"I should get ready and-"

"Did you ever use them?"

"Uh?"

"The tickets. Did you ever go?"

"Tickets?"

He gave her a puzzled look and she frowned.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what you're referring to."

"Never mind." He said. "Yashiro san is waiting for me, I'll be go-"

"Tsuruga san…" she cut him "I wanted to say… I'm really sorry…" she brought her wings together in a posture of prayer "about… everything."

"It's ok, Mogami san." He picked up the chicken head that had been carelessly abandoned on the bench. "I'm actually relieved that _you_ were the chicken." He handed the head to her "I trust you."

She smiled at that.

"I am very honored." She stated, with a small bow. "And… I am sure you will..." She said carefully "There is no woman on this earth that would prefer any man to you."

He looked to the side and moved to the door.

"Tsuruga san?"

"Just…" he said dispassionately "I wont forget what you said."

* * *

_Are they in there?_ Yashiro wondered.

He had presented himself to the _Kimagure Rock_ staff and they said he would find the chicken in this room. But it wouldn't be a good idea to knock if Kyoko and Ren were inside, confessing their feelings… Was anyone really in this room? He wasn't hearing anything.

The door opened and Ren came out. He looked normal, but behind him was a blushing Kyoko. The door closed too fast, and Ren was out.

"Let's go." He said, and Yashiro followed after him.

"Ren?" he was walking very fast "Kotonami san said that…"

"Yes. Mogami san was the chicken." He stopped unexpectedly and Yashiro almost bumped into him. "What happened with Morizumi san?"

"Uh…." Yashiro felt week in his knees. _What is he going to do to me when I tell him that she tried to push Kyoko chan off the balcony_… "I'm sure you remember Morizumi Kimiko, from-"

"_Purple Down_, yes."

"Hum… She was auditioning for Momiji, and… I don't know what exactly she told Kyoko chan but…"

"Do you think that…" He looked thoughtful.

Yashiro waited, but nothing else came. _Do I think that what? That she told lies about you to make Kyoko chan lose her concentration? Yes! That's exactly what I think! _Yashiro wanted to grab him and shake him until everything came out, but he wasn't exactly looking forward to having that talk about Morizumi Kimiko…

"Ren?"

"Can you take me to Day Jowey Land?" he started another conversation, brushing his unfinished question aside. "I need to buy something."

Wasn't that the theme park where… Didn't he already purchase tickets there for Kyoko? Did she not get them?

Yashiro was dying of curiosity. Those chicken conversations were definitely something that he would never know the details of. They belonged only to Ren and Kyouko. _At least it doesn't seem to have made things worse_… Now Yashiro would just have to wait and see how things played out.

"Yes, sure!" he said "let's go."

Maybe good things would come out of it. Maybe… everything happens for a reason?

oOo

**_Author's note: _**

**_**_Hello everyone, it's been a while! I'm sorry this is kind of a mess (I blame the mess happening in canon): _**it hasn't been proofread or polished correctly, and I just finished it on a whim, but I thought some people might find it fun :) _**

**_Obviously, the idea came to me after chapter 272. I wanted Kanae to use Kyoko's words when she spoke to Kuon, leading to this chat with Bo that was also a way to set the events of the special chapter. I started writing this 2 months ago, but dropped it after 273 came out and seemed to make it irrelevant… Of course, spoilers for 274 made me want to finish it (the last 600 words or so in case you're wondering)! __Chances are high now that Kuon says something to Bo that will be the reason Kyoko turns into a boiled octopus! So exciting!_**


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